Ritual for Paleoscrying

A Ritual for Scrying with the Spirits of Dinosaurs

You will need:

• A clean vessel, bowl, or cup
• UFO Water
• Candles
• Incense (preferably copal or amber, or a conifer derivative)
• Amber (preferably containing an insect)
• Dinosaur fossils
• A liquid form of petroleum or petroleum byproduct. Some examples: 

Motor Oil
Kerosene
Lubricants like WD-40
Paraffin Wax
Vaseline (Petroleum Jelly)
Solvents
Propellants
Cosmetics
Plastic products
Food additives:

Artificial Colors: Yellow #5 (Tartrazine), Red #40 (Allura Red AC), and Blue #1 (Brilliant Blue FCF)
BHA (Butylated Hydroxyanisole) and BHT (Butylated Hydroxytoluene)
TBHQ (Tertiary Butylhydroquinone)Propylene Glycol
Sodium Stearoyl Lactylate
Polysorbate 80
Sorbitan Monostearate
Potassium Bromate

1. Light your candles and incense and prepare your room accordingly.
2. Place the vessel on a flat surface, surrounded by the fossils/amber/etc.
3. Fill the vessel with UFO water (not too full).
4. While your question in mind, slowly pour (or scatter, if you’re using a dry product like crumbled Flamin’ Hot Cheetoes) some of the petroleum product onto the surface of the water, reciting the following:
   “In the name of Ascalabus, in the name of Abas, in the name of Sobek of the River, I invite you, saurian spirits! Speak to me, speak to me, grant me the wisdom and knowledge of your people, tell me what I wish to know. Great and ancient ancestors [here you could include the specific name of a dinosaur species], I call upon you to visit me, your humble descendant.” 
5. [Optional] If you have some amber, rub it vigorously to generate an electric charge, and place it in the vessel.
6. Breathe over the vessel and say, “I call upon the spirit of amber and the spirit of breath, I invoke the great names of power MNASH MNASH MNANE MNANT, MNASH MNASH MNANT MNANE PHONI PHONT. Let the darkness fade and come into the light; let the light appear!”
7. As the oil etc. settles, begin scrying; peer into the bowl and look for images in the oil, or in the mind’s eye, until you have a reply to your question.
8. Once your question has or hasn’t been answered to your satisfaction, recite the following: “Thanks to you, great ancestors, aerial friends from so long ago. I dismiss you into the peace of eternity.” 
9. [Optional] Pour the water/oil/amber into a mason jar which can then be sealed and used for dinosaur scrying in the future.